Parenting is hard. By far the hardest thing I have ever done, and I’m sure most would agree. I tend to second guess every decision I make. Is this what’s best for them? Is this somehow going to scar them for life? What is best for their physical and mental health?
All day long.
All day long I constantly question my decisions and tactics because I know these early years will greatly shape their lives. The way we choose to raise them means everything. They will carry it with them forever, and what if we choose wrong?
Should I make sure the house is spotless and completely baby proofed? Should I bend over backwards to soley breastfeed? Should I be planning more enriching activities instead of letting them watch some tv? Should I always be on time with my kids and myself perfectly dressed? Should I stop sleeping late(ish) in the mornings? Should I get up early to prepare everyone’s breakfast?
At the end of the day, all I can do is love them. I have to accept that I will make mistakes and things won’t always be perfect. I won’t always be perfect, but I need to remember to care for myself too. As long as my first priority was always to love them and keep them safe, then things can’t possibly turn out that bad. Here are 3 things I feel you should never apologize for as a parent.
Having a Messy House
First of all, you live here. Being alive creates messes, it’s a scientific fact. Second of all, you are raising tiny humans and those little boogers create a lot of laundry, dishes, and other miscellaneous messes. Have you seen how much stuff they require? A ton. A ton of stuff. And while that stuff is getting used, it often gets left out.
My 2 year old plays all day long. So, toys are everywhere. There’s no point in picking them up because he’s only going to continue playing which means they’re out all day long. I clean them up every night after he goes to bed, which basically means my house is only clean while I’m sleeping. Awesome.
But you know what? That’s okay. I try so hard! I do household chores every single day. I work hard to make sure our home is still up to code with basic hygene. As long as the toilets are clean, I vacuum (on occasion), etc. who cares if there are toys on every inch of the floor and dishes in the sink? I’m doing my best y’all.
Getting myself out of bed after a restless night of getting children back to sleep is hard enough. But once I’m up I have to get BOTH kids fed (one breastfeeds in the morning while the other requires me actually cooking something), myself fed, the dog fed and let out, BOTH kids dressed (and then most likely changed due to a spit up or poop explosion type situation), MYSELF dressed, hair and makeup done, shoes on, diaper bag packed, car loaded, and get them buckled into car seats. By myself.
It takes approximately 2 years, 3 toddler meltdowns, 5 baby spit ups, and I cried approximately 4 times. So…no, I’m not really sorry I’m late.
Sleeping Whenever You Can
I’m lucky in that our whole family is night owls. My husband and I tend to stay up until a little after midnight every night. That’s our time to either get some things done, or spend time together. We then sleep until our children drag us kicking and screaming out of bed in the morning. We’re fortunate they sleep until 8:30/9:00ish MOST days (some days they randomly get up at 5, it’s a thing).
In my perfect world, I would rise at 7 and get a quick workout in, then maybe get a little blogging or answering of emails done between 8 and 9 before the kids rise. Then they’d wake up to my smiling face and I could greet them with hot breakfasts.
But I’m a human, and I’m tired, so I sleep.
Feeding Your Baby
This is a big one! However you choose to feed your baby, never apologize! If you’re exclusively breastfeeding, good! If you’re pumping, good! If you’re formula feeding, good! As long as your baby is fed, you’re doing a great job.
Don’t feel embarrassed for breastfeeding in public. Don’t feel bad when you excuse yourself to go pump. And don’t feel less than for giving your baby a bottle of formula. We all need to eat to survive. However you’re making that happen for you’re little one, is great. YOU are doing a great job!
I’ve shared a lot about my feeding journey with both boys. I’ve breastfed and supplemented with formula both times. Both of my babies have been failure to thrive, and needed a little extra to help them grow. Some people might look down on formula, but I like to see it as the best of both worlds! He still gets all the benefits and bonding time from breastfeeding, plus the extra calories he needs to grow from formula. I know their bellies are full, and I see the scale go up. As a preemie Mama, that’s all I want and more.
I’ve talked a lot about our experience supplementing with formula and the different brands I like! I recently started learning more about Enfamil and their Enfamil Family Beginnings® program. They’re even giving away free formula for a year! Lot’s of new and expectant Mothers choose Enfamil because it’s the #1 recommended brand by pediatricians, their formulations help foster baby brain development and bodily nourishment, and Enfamil provides their customers with tons of support and advice!
You can also join the Enfamil Family Beginnings® program which will provide you with Enfamil formula samples, valuable savings through coupons, belly badge stickers, special offers, expert advice, and you’ll be entered into the free formula for a year sweepstakes! The free samples and coupons can save you a lot of money. One of the biggest drawbacks to supplementing or exclusively formula feeding is that it gets expensive. Stock up on all the coupons and free samples you can!
The Enfamil website is full of resources for Moms. Pregnancy and postpartum advice, recipes, workouts, fertility and more!
Check out my video on feeding your baby below:
What will you not apologize for as a parent? Comment below!